Show And Tell

When I picked up our youngest from pre-school yesterday, the teacher took me aside and told me that our daughter had pulled her pants down in the classroom earlier in the day, presumably because a little boy had dared her to. The story had the makings of a really bad after-school special.

Once we were in the car, I asked our little llama about her day. She, of course, did not offer any information regarding StripGate, so I asked, “Did you pull your pants down at school today?”

First, she looked at me like I was the smartest person in the world since she had not overheard my conversation with her teacher. Then she replied, “Davey did it first!”

Davey! (To be uttered under your breath like Seinfeld used to say “Newman!”) I knew it couldn’t be that sweet Dillon. Then I said, “What did he say to you?”

“He said, ‘I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.’”

Are there any other nine-word sentences that evoke more horror in a mother?!?

“Then what happened?” I asked weakly.

“And then he did. Show me his.” (EDITOR’S NOTE: Just a reminder that this is PRE-SCHOOL, not MELROSE PLACE.)

Yikes! For a girl without brothers, this had to be a shocker. That’s when we had the discussion about keeping your private parts private and doing what you know is right even when others are not.

As I drew the girls’ bath water last night, thinking about our youngest daughter’s full frontal display at school and watching our older daughter’s full-0n air guitar rock star solo – which she did while completely nude (at least SHE was about to take a bath), I wondered how two modest people like my husband and me could have spawned such exhibitionist children.

I always like to look on the positive side of things, so I’m delighted that our girls have such a healthy self-image in terms of their bodies. On the other hand, revealing one’s private parts is socially unacceptable and frowned upon in public, particularly the Catholic school our youngest will attend with her sister next fall. In fact, I’m fairly certain that flashing could get you some serious Hail Marys and detention. It’s kind of like that former co-worker of mine who made a pro and con list about her new boyfriend. He was abusive, she wrote, but he liked cats. The positive doesn’t begin to outweigh the negative.

Therefore, we will hope that pulling down her pants at school is but a momentary phase and, as her comforting teacher suggested, a normal act at this curious stage of development. I just know that I’ll never think of Show and Tell as an innocent child’s game again.