Friends

Yesterday, my closest friend moved three hours away. While this is by no means an insurmountable distance, it will be a new chapter in our friendship. For roughly the past 20 years, we’ve lived in the same city – and for several years, we were roommates, beginning right after we graduated from college.

Over the past two decades, I can’t think of any major events we missed in each other’s lives. Careers. Dating. Meeting our husbands. Being bridesmaids in each other’s weddings. The births of our children. Serving as godmothers for each other’s kids.

The good news is that we STILL won’t miss any big events. We’ll just have to plan a little harder.

Over the years, our lives have gone in different directions, to a certain extent. As proud of her as I am, I can’t always relate to her high-powered job. And I’m sure she has trouble at times understanding my struggles as a stay-at-home mom. But the beautiful thing about friendship – particularly friends you’ve had for so long – is that you can grow in different directions without really ever growing apart.

I was reminded of this last weekend when she and another close friend of ours took me on a girls’ trip to celebrate my upcoming milestone birthday. The spa day and shopping were awesome – but the best part was just spending time with these amazing friends I’ve known for most, if not all, of my adult life. There’s something to be said for that rich history you share with certain people – the people who know the true essence of you, before you were someone’s wife or someone’s mother or someone’s colleague. It was a wonderful weekend and a fitting time to celebrate not just a birthday but friendships that last and sustain us throughout the year, every year, no matter how far away we live from each other.

Female friendships are so powerful and so necessary. I hope that my daughters will be blessed with the same kinds of long-lasting friendships I’ve had in my life. From early on, I’ve always been fortunate to be surrounded by interesting, smart, funny, kind and beautiful (on the inside as well as the outside) girls and women…and that’s been so important.

Michael W. Smith and his wife wrote the song “Friends” many years ago when a member of their Bible study was moving away. Since it touches on such a timely theme – and also holds sentimental value from our days as Tri-Delt sorority sisters during Rush week – I thought I would end with these lyrics, which reiterate that friendship is not limited by time or distance:

Packing up the dreams God planted

In the fertile soil of you

Can’t believe the hopes He’s granted

Means a chapter in your life is through

But we’ll keep you close as always

It won’t even seem you’ve gone

‘Cause our hearts in big and small ways

Will keep the love that keeps us strong

********

And friends are friends forever

If the Lord’s the Lord of them

And a friend will not say never

‘Cause the welcome will not end

Though it’s hard to let you go

In the Father’s hands we know

That a lifetime’s not too long to live as friends.