Double Feature

People often ask me if our girls are twins, in spite of their clear height differences. And my honest answer to this question would be, “Yes, although one of them waited to make her appearance 18 months later.”

I think God, in His infinite wisdom, knew I would not be a good candidate to have twins – especially as a first-time mother. Frankly, it was a full-time job to stress and obsess over a single baby. However, having children a year and a half apart is precariously close to a multiple birth. In fact, a father of twins recently told me he thought the 18-month gap would be MORE difficult than having kids who share a birthday.

Because at least with twins, you’d truly have equals in terms of age, development and readiness. Our younger daughter doesn’t seem to understand that her older sister IS older and therefore gets to do things before she does and apart from her.

But just like twins, neither of our llamas remember a time when they didn’t have a sibling along for the ride. Plus, I suspect we’ll have to encourage our children to create their own unique identities as they grow up since they are so close in age and are both girls. I want to avoid a “Marcia! Marcia! Marcia!” complex if at all possible (The Brady Bunch truly did have its finger on the pulse of family issues, didn’t it?!?).

Although I didn’t have long to experience an only child, I think that, in general, having two kids versus one is WAY harder – whether they are 18 minutes or 18 months or 18 years apart. And I don’t want to even think about juggling three. That’s why my husband and I are stopping at two, while we can still use a man-to-man defense and not be forced into a zone. I know only children can be challenging, too, but I’d estimate that 90% of the struggles we go through stem from the interaction between our two little angels.

Having said all that, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Raising our “twins” a year and a half apart doubles the trouble occasionally – but also doubles the joy the rest of the time.