Organized Crime

One of the greatest mysteries in life is how the neatness gene can skip a generation. As previously noted, I’m a bit anal-retentive – and always have been – about having everything in its place. However, our daughters are not burdened with this same DNA and could not care less about keeping their toys and other miscellaneous belongings in their designated positions.

I really tried to loosen up once I had children because I realized kids are not usually wired that way and I didn’t want to be one of those moms who squashed everyone’s fun. But enough is enough!!

Our home tends to get more and more trashed as the week progresses. Both girls are in school on Monday and Tuesday, so it stays picked up for the most part. Wednesday is dicey because our youngest is home with me, but she goes back to school on Thursday so if I keep it in check, it doesn’t get completely out of control. Then Friday and the weekend hit…and it’s all over. A lethal combination of fatigue, apathy and a dizzying schedule of soccer games/birthday parties yields a messy and disorganized house.

As I walked from room to room this weekend surveying the damage like a FEMA official, I was amazed at the destruction left behind by Hurricane Llama. If the Governor had stopped by, he would have declared it a disaster area. The only problem is, there is no federal assistance for homes destroyed by one’s own children, so it was up to us to begin the cleanup.

I’m always discouraged by the fact that what takes our girls only 3.5 minutes to drag out takes approximately six hours to restore to its original state. How is that possible?!? If the kids would just put up what they got out BEFORE getting something else out, we’d have a much better system. However, they don’t and the cumulative effect is overwhelming and disturbing – especially when I’m also behind on the laundry, dishes and housework.

In a moment of desperation, I believe I even asked my husband if we could just cut our losses and move. That’s right. I said it.

In the end, it took a few hours to complete the cleanup and get everything back in its place. The bad news? That’s two hours I’ll never get back. The good news? I don’t have to think about moving again for at least another four days.